Cher and Val Kilmer developed a deep connection despite the gap in their ages. Even after they separated, their bond remained so strong that when he fell ill, she offered him a gesture he couldn’t refuse.
According to his daughter, Mercedes Kilmer, her father, Val Kilmer, died on April 1, 2025, from pneumonia. Before his passing in Los Angeles, the actor had been diagnosed with throat cancer in 2014. This was a diagnosis he later overcame, though not without the support of a former partner who became a cherished friend.
The Former Couple’s Relationship
Cher, a singer, actress, and producer, met Val in the early 1980s at a birthday party hosted by a mutual friend. In his book, “I’m Your Huckleberry: A Memoir,” Val recalled dining alone in a Manhattan restaurant when that same friend approached him.
The unnamed friend told him someone wanted to meet him. When he asked who, she replied, Cher. Shocked, he spat out his food and exclaimed, “No!” He initially resisted the introduction, thinking they had nothing in common.
Cher and Val Kilmer chatting and laughing at the 36th Annual Tony Awards Party on June 6, 1982 | Source: Getty Images
Still, the friend urged him to meet her, insisting, “Her real personality is different than her TV personality. I guarantee, she’s the funniest person you’ll ever meet.” Cher, meanwhile, recalled their mutual pal saying, “I invited this guy and I think either you or my friend who’s an editor will like him.”
They eventually met at another restaurant, this time with ten people at the table. Val agreed to attend only after being told he could leave if he didn’t find the singer, born May 20, 1946, and turning 79 in 2025, interesting. But he did and so he stayed.
A promotional portrait of Cher for “The Sonny and Cher Comedy Hour” on June 7, 1970 | Source: Getty Images
Val found her “hysterically funny” and ended up giving her a ride home on his Harley Davidson. Before their relationship blossomed, lasting over a year, he once took her to see a Japanese version of “Macbeth.” She thought he was eccentric and believed, like he did, that they were incompatible.
At the time, he was around 21, and she was in her mid-30s—though she looked younger than him. The age gap was a significant hurdle back then. Cher explained that dating older men wasn’t viable, and without younger suitors, she might not have dated at all.
Cher and actor Val Kilmer at the 36th Annual Tony Awards after-party at the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel in New York City | Source: Getty Images
She found that younger men were more confident and less intimidated by older women, while men her own age showed little interest. Cher and Val bonded over their shared sense of humor and soon became close friends. When he first began spending the night, it was purely platonic.
They became so close that they gave each other nicknames. Since he didn’t want to shout “Cher,” and she didn’t want to call out “Val,” they dubbed themselves Sid and Ethel. They also jokingly referred to themselves as Valus Maximus and Cherus Reprimandus, the latter reflecting her role in the household.
Val Kilmer and Cher hold hands | Source: Getty Images
Eventually, they began dating, with Val becoming completely enamored with her. During their time together, he often shared his dreams. One New Year’s Eve, they chose to stay in, and Val brought art supplies to the house. They spent the evening creating art with her children, a night Cher called the best New Year’s Eve of her life.
She fondly remembered how well he treated her children. An example of this is how he allowed her then-nine-year-old son, Elijah, to drive his truck on his property. She fondly described Val as a free spirit who always pushed boundaries.
Cher, Elijah Blue Allman, and Val Kilmer at Academy Awards circa 1980 | Source: Getty Images
They experienced both highs and lows because, as Cher put it, they were “both Alpha males” who refused to compromise their individuality. Nonetheless, Val was supportive, even helping her with her screen test for “Mask” and boosting her confidence.
She said their shared humor and mutual tolerance were greater than what she had with any other man. The vocalist revealed, “He would just go off and do his own thing and you just had to be prepared. And he was so beautiful. It went from madly in love and laughing hysterically to respecting each other’s ability.”
Cher, her children, and Val Kilmer at the “Little Shop of Horrors” showing on September 2, 1982, in New York City | Source: Getty Images
In an interview on “The Howard Stern Show,” Cher admitted her enduring feelings for Val, while revealing “he left.” She accepted the end of their relationship, explaining that some people are only meant to be in our lives for a season. Still, she cared for him when he became sick.
Val Kilmer and Cher at the “Grease II” Premiere Party on June 9, 1982, in New York City | Source: Getty Images
Taking Care of Val in His Time of Need
The pair remained close friends after their breakup, with Cher remembering how the actor spent much of his illness at her home. Though they never formally ended their relationship, their friendship only grew stronger.
She admired his bravery during his illness and saw how much he suffered. In his memoir, Val wrote that after discovering a lump in his throat—which was later confirmed to be cancer—Cher stepped in to care for him. Following the 2008 financial crisis, Val was forced to sell his New Mexico property and rent a cottage on the Malibu coast.
Val Kilmer and Cher at the Academy Awards in Los Angeles on April 11, 1983 | Source: Getty Images
As his breathing troubles worsened, Cher invited him to stay in her guesthouse. They spent time talking about politics and poetry, with Val describing her as the best company. On one occasion, he became so ill he coughed up blood.
After praying, he called 911 and then Cher. Despite the frightening situation, the two couldn’t help but laugh as they noticed how attractive one of the paramedics were! They burst into audible laughter until an oxygen mask cut him off!
Val Kilmer and Cher at the 55th Academy Awards in Los Angeles, California, on April 11, 1983 | Source: Getty Images
When she later told him she had watched his 2021 documentary, “Val,” he replied, “Sid, it’s you.” Cher applauded his creativity and courage in creating the film. She called him an artist, though she also described him as a “brat”—something she forgave.
The songstress said she forgave everything he did, and even when she was upset, there was still joy between them. She admitted that if he ever called, she would be there, no matter where she was.
Val Kilmer and Cher at a Bette Midler Video Party on January 9, 1984 | Source: Getty Images
Cher revealed she still loved him and once wrote to him saying, “Valus Maximus, I’m sorry if I did anything to [expletive] you off or hurt your feelings. I love you and your documentary was all things… I love the things that [expletive] me off, the things that made me hysterical, amazed, hurt, astonished, etc. You are brave and beyond brilliant. Ethel.”
She described him as a Renaissance man who never let illness stop him. Calling his documentary an “extension of his art and his life,” she admired how he openly revealed even the most difficult moments, wanting fans to know the real him. Unfortunately, his health continued to decline, though he found love again after Cher.
Cher and Val Kilmer in an unspecified photo | Source: Getty Images
The Mother of His Children
Before meeting his ex-wife Joanne Whalley, Val had a dream in which he met the woman he was meant to be with. Inspired, he woke up and wrote a poem titled “We’ve Just Met but Marry Me Please.”
Soon after, he attended a play in London where Joanne performed. Captivated, he followed her to a pub after-party just to look at her. He didn’t speak to her, but fate intervened.
Val Kilmer and Joanne Whalley at the “Hurlyburly” Opening Night Party on November 16, 1988, in Century City, California | Source: Getty Images
In 1987, two years later, Joanne was cast opposite Val in “Willow,” and they eventually married and welcomed children. Their marriage eventually ended and his later cancer diagnosis robbed him of his speech, before he got help.
Val Kilmer, Joanne Whalley, and Mercedes Kilmer at a preview performance of the Broadway play “Death and the Maiden” on February 20, 1992, in New York City | Source: Getty Images
The Effects of Cancer and Val’s Recovery
In a 2020 interview, it was revealed that Val no longer sounded like himself following a long absence from Hollywood. After undergoing a tracheostomy in 2015, he permanently lost his voice, which severely impacted his acting career.
He remained voiceless until late 2020, when Sonantic, a UK-based voice cloning software company, helped him recreate his voice. The technology is so advanced that it became difficult to tell the difference between his real and artificial voice.
He made a comeback in 2022 with “Top Gun: Maverick.” By forcing air through his windpipe, he managed to make himself somewhat understood. The air passed through the hole in his throat where the tracheostomy tube was inserted.
The resulting sound was described as “something between a squeak and a voiceless roar.” Val said endless vocal exercises that he practiced during his time at Juilliard helped him talk.
He explained that he learned to control his voice “like it was a trumpet.” Though he disliked the strict rules and voice exercises at Juilliard, they paid off in the end. By the next year, six years after his diagnosis, he had undergone radiation, chemotherapy, and the tracheostomy but was finally cancer-free at age 61.
He also released the documentary that Cher so admired. “Val” became a family project, with his children Jack and Mercedes Kilmer helping him produce it. In the film, Val declared, “Now that it’s more difficult to speak, I want to tell my story more than ever.”
He added, “I obviously am sounding much worse than I feel.” The star confessed, “I can’t speak without plugging this hole [in his throat]. You have to make the choice to breathe or to eat.” At the time, he was being fed through a tube. He noted, “It’s an obstacle that is very present with whoever sees me.”
Jack narrated much of the documentary by reading his father’s words. The film received a standing ovation at the Cannes Film Festival.
Jack and Mercedes Kilmer at the “Val” photocall during the 74th annual Cannes Film Festival on July 7, 2021, in Cannes, France | Source: Getty Images
Co-directors Leo Scott and Ting Poo were inspired by Val Kilmer’s vast archive of personal footage and chose to work with him after getting to know him. Leo said, “We approached him three years ago,” recalling their work together on “Cinema Twain,” other projects, and archiving his footage.
After learning of her dear friend’s passing at 65, born on December 31, 1959, Cher posted a heartfelt tribute on X. Referring to their nicknames, she wrote, “VALUS Will miss u,U Were Funny,crazy,pain in the [expletive],GREAT FRIEND,kids. U, BRILLIANT as Mark Twain, BRAVE here during ur sickness.”
Cher and Val shared a rare connection—one that began with friendship, deepened through love, and endured through life’s challenges. His passing marks the end of a remarkable life, but their story remains a testament to enduring friendship and heartfelt devotion.